This page is about the project. For the religion, click here.
The blueprints for True Mecha Jesus
Mecha-Jesusology, or the Mecha-Jesus Program, is designed to create an android war general that has the powers that the Christian prophet Jesus has, plus more. There have been several "Mecha-Jesus"-s created, MJ1, MJ2, MJ3, and True Mecha Jesus, all but one of which are completed. They are all also androids.
Physiology[]
MJ1[]
MJ1, or Mecha Jesus One, is the first experiment at creating Mecha Jesus. He has most of the powers Jesus had in the bible, such as walking on water (achieved by air jets) and the ability to come back from the dead (achieved via detachable parts), except for turning water to wine. MJ1 is about 5 foot tall, and has a lengthy beard based off of Satanta Claws of the Omega-Jesusology project. He is the race of black and wears a Greek toga and a crown made of nuts and bolts. MJ1 is also extremely buff-looking, but is easily broken apart.
MJ2[]
MJ2, or Mecha Jesus Two, is the second in the line of Mecha Jesus attempts. He has all powers MJ1 had, but cannot came back form the dead as easily. In return, he does have the ability to turn water to wine, which he uses as fuel for his flame-thrower appendage, which replaces his left arm and only works when drunk. He is 5 and a half feet tall with one metal leg. He is, contrary to MJ1, based off of a white man. His beard has gotten notably smaller, based off of one of the Duck Dynasty hunters. He is slightly less buff-looking. He wears clothing of Ancient Egypt and wears a crown of dried snake skins.
MJ3[]
MJ3, or Mecha Jesus Three, is the last completed Mecha Jesus experiment. He has all powers of MJ1 & 2, except for his left arm being replaced by a flame-thrower, MJ3's left hand is completely robotic and can turn into a flame-thrower, a grenade launcher, a buzz saw, and a frozen yogurt machine. He is Asian and stands at 4 feet 10 inches, the shortest of the Mecha Jesus-s. His attire is a hippie-ish look straight from the 70's, when he was made, with a crown of marijuana leaves.
True Mecha Jesus[]
True Mecha Jesus is the last installment to the Mecha Jesusology project and will have, when completed, all powers of the others, but 5 times as powerful. He is supposedly based off of a Jewish man from the time of the real Jesus's actual birth. He stands at 6 feet tall, the tallest of all, and will have a stubble beard. Not much else is known about True Mecha Jesus except that he will wear a modern biker's outfit with shades and a crown made of pure gold and silver.
History[]
The Mecha-Jesusology project was formed in 0000 AD by an unknown civilization's government, but was abandoned until 1902, when a government-employed archaeologist dug up an ancient blueprint book from the time depicting the androids that were started being worked on a half month later.True Mecha Jesus is dated to be completed sometime in August, 2015.
Trivia[]
- Mecha Jesusology's blueprints book was most likely created by Rome
- This is suggested by the book's language and style
- True Mecha Jesus will look the most like the real Jesus would